It was inevitable. No, maybe not the hysteria now, well in fact yes, the hysteria; but this post. How could SMT! monkeys not post about this topic. Not only infecting through the lungs of its victims, but also the social networks, this world wide media epidemic has been stretched and shoved down our throats almost to the proportion of bird flu. If you haven’t already guess, correct, i am a sceptic of it all. Maybe that’s because i am in a relatively isolated region, am very comfortable at the moment and in a very good state of health. Although don’t try to get me to do 100 push-ups, you’ll only waste my time, i top out close to 800. Anyhow, back to the bacon craze!

What i cannot understand is how so many gullible people firstly complain about how stupid fools believe everything they hear on the news, and secondly run out and get a flu shot. Especially after the media they are following says the flu shot does absolutely nothing, but make you hurt for a bit, then vaccinate you for the stock standard, no bells and whistles influenza virus. But you know more than every other person, especially the people around you. You’re the regular old conspiracy nut aren’t you, and you certainly know a heap more than what the media tells us.

I’m on neither side here. I hate those people that do that. Yes, you really aren’t the smartest specimen of a human now are you. But you’re careful and cautious well done. No flu for you next winter. Swine flu however, also not! Why? Because you watch too much tv, and come back to that stuff non-stop, you’re quite the worker bee for the television companies now aren’t you? What really annoys me however is these stupid media outlets, attempt to tap into my cynical mind also, but then try and convert me back to your mainstream idea. Take CNN this week for example, you tell me that its all in the media, and its hyped, and that it cannot be as harmful as we previously thought. Then at the end of the article you tell us to take all the precautions necessary, to fight this thing, to be prepared.

Heck, one of the ministers for Health here said that people should be buying canned food for their cupboards in order to be “prepared”. Like a dead fish about to make its last move, she flips her statement and says people should remain calm and not worry. Let me get this straight. While i’m walking down into my apocalyptic 666 bunker, you tell me not to worry, and that its probably nothing anyway. You mean to tell me alot of people are now eating sardines out of a can? Well i guess, that you minister, for inflicting torture onto those dim light minds. Sponge Bob would be proud at how receptive their minds really are.

You’re damn right, i sound like i know exactly what i’m talking about here, all cocky like. But thats where you’re wrong. I don’t know what i’m talking about. However unlike you, i don’t profess to know it either. I haven’t run out to get a flu shot, and i don’t say people who believe everything on TV are dumb and stupid yet watch the stuff and abide by all their recommendations. Please people, i’m no better than you, but don’t think you’re better than anyone else because you follow command yet say others are dumb for believing the media.

To make you cry, i heard someone say they don’t believe everything they read or hear, yet profess the American government was responsible for the development and deployment of this swine virus! I mean, there’s enough evidence in that sentence to throw your argument out the window before you can even take your next breath in to supply that thing you call a brain in your skull. To clear up any future discrepancies, the source i got this statement from was not direct from the person, but something they “read”, *anger and fury subsides*. I hate you conspiracy theory fools, you’re almost as bad as religion, except you have sometimes science and imagery to go along with your cases.

Part 2 to follow.